Growing in Christ
Samuel Rutherford
Visits of Christ
32 years ago
In reflecting on the state of my soul lately, I can’t remember one single day in the last year where I wasn’t tempted to, battle with, or succumbed to spiritual depression. By spiritual depression I simply mean that black, hopeless cloud of a downward spiral into a meaningless, ambivalent, despair, fueled mostly by doubt and (for me) anger. It’s not precisely happy land, but a land nonetheless. Of course circumstances don’t particularly matter, this is one of those things that comes about for various randomly prompted reasons. However, in a recent trial Michelle and I have been facing, I’ve seen the temptation arrive at my door step.
With this, I have once again picked up the letters of a good (dead) friend of mine, Samuel Rutherford. His spiritual experience of God is nothing short of staggering. I’m particularly fond of reading his letters, not so much because he’s a dead Puritan, but because his experience and expressions of Christ help clear the fog for me and set a vision of what I want for my own life with Christ. In a letter I read last night, he spoke to the subject of spiritual depression with the following remark to a friend:
Now, my dear brother, I cannot show you how matters go betwixt Christ and me. I find my Lord going and coming seven times a day. His visits are short; but they are both frequent and sweet. I dare not for my life think of a challenge of my Lord. I hear ill tales, and hard reports of Christ, from The Tempter and my flesh; but love believeth no evil. I may swear that they are liars, and that [such] apprehensions make lies of Christ’s honest and unalterable love to me. ~ Samuel Rutherford, Letters #92, 195.
What he says is astonishing: The war of liars of “false lies” from Satan and his own flesh is fought by the declaring the true and unalterable love of Christ for him, which he experiences regularly. The Gospel says “Yes!” to our sin and it’s just punishment in Hell, but quickly follows up with the open arms and extension of Jesus Christ’s love for us in the mercy of his work on the cross. In my spiritual depression, there is a fog light of love to be seen in Christ. As Rutherford states, Christ’s love for me is “honest and unalterable.” More over, I long to experience Christ’s presence and love regularly through the day. How does one aim at this? By warding off Satan and the flesh’s regular attacks of condemnation with the Gospel. Jesus Christ died to save lost and hopeless people, one of the great truths to be seen here is that God initiates salvation to bring me near. He runs to save, he runs to love, not because of me, not because of what I add to him, but because he chooses to. God comes near in the Gospel not once, but regularly. Regular visits of Christ in love for the enjoyment of my soul.
As the Psalmist says:
Why are you cast down, O my soul,
and why are you in turmoil within me?
Hope in God; for I shall again praise him,
my salvation and my God. ~ Psalm 43:5
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As an aside, I highly recommend checking out Samuel Rutherford’s Letters for lasting spiritual benefit.
Light Christianity
03 years ago
But, verily, I see Christianity is conceived to be more easy and lighter than it is; so that I sometimes think I never knew anything but the letters of that name; for our nature contenteth itself with little in godliness. Our “Lord Lord” seemeth to us ten “Lord-Lords.” Little holiness in our balance is much, because it is our own holiness; and we love to lay small burdens upon our soft natures, and to make a fair court-way to heaven. And I know it were necessary to take more pains than we do, and not to make heaven a city more easily taken than God hath made it. I persuade myself that many runners shall come short, and get a disappointment. Oh! how easy is it to deceive ourselves, and to sleep, and wish that heaven may fall down in our laps! Yet for all my Lord’s glooms, I find Him sweet, gracious, loving, kind; and I want both pen and words to set forth the fairness, beauty, and sweetness of Christ’s love, and the honour of this cross of Christ, which is glorious to me, though the world thinketh shame thereof. I verily think that the cross of Christ would blush and think shame of these thin-skinned worldings, who are so married to their credit that they are ashamed of the sufferings of Christ. O the honour to be scourged and stoned with Christ, and to go through a furious faced death to life eternal! But men would have [security] against Christ’s cross.
Samuel Rutherford, Letters (Carlisle, Banner of Truth Trust), p. 145. (Italics mine.)
A Sweet and Perfumed Cross
03 years ago
As a mild introduction about the context of this wonderful quote, Samuel Rutherford had just been removed from his pastorate in Anworth, Scotland and banished to Aberdeen, Scotland for being a nonconformist. After his hearing, he wrote a letter to a friend from which this quote comes. Here he describes this new cross, the heaviness of leaving his flock behind, and the hope of a restored church in Scotland because of a victorious Savior.
Howbeit Christ’s green cross, newly laid upon me, be somewhat heavy, while I call to mind the many fair days sweet and comfortable to my soul and to the souls of many others and how young ones in Christ are plucked from the breast, and the inheritance of God laid waste; yet that sweet smelled and perfumed cross of Christ is accompanied with sweet refreshments, with the kisses of a King, with the joy of the Holy Ghost, with faith that the Lord hears the sighing of a prisoner, with undoubted hope (as sure as my Lord liveth) after this night to see daylight, and Christ’s sky to clear up again upon me, and his poor [church]; and that in a strange land, among strange faces, He will give favour in the eyes of men to His poor oppressed servant, who dow (thrives) not but love that lovely One, that princely One, Jesus, the Comforter of his soul…[W]elcome, welcome, sweet, sweet and glorious cross of Christ; welcome, sweet Jesus with Thy light cross. Thou hast now gained and gotten all my love from me; keep what Thou has gotten!
Samuel Rutherford, Letters #61, 136-137
Benifiting From A Cross
03 years ago
As I mentioned before, I’ve been reading the Letters of Samuel Rutherford. What an amazingly wise man, who knew God, and profoundly understood the Savior. Below is a quote from a letter he wrote to a woman friend of his who had just lost yet another child. You can read the full letter here, #35. I pray you benefit from this as much as I have:
I verily believe when, I write this, your Lord hath taught your Ladyship to lay your hand on your mouth. But I shall be far from desiring your Ladyship, or any others, to cast by a cross, like an old useless bill that is only for the fire; but rather would wish each cross were looked in the face seven times, and were read over and over again. It is the messenger of the Lord, and speaks something; and the man of understanding will hear the rod, and Him that hath appointed it. Try what is the taste of the Lord’s cup, and drink with God’s blessing, that ye may grow thereby. I trust in God, whatever speech it utter to your soul, this is one word in it, – “Behold blessed is the man whom God correcteth” (Job 5:17); and that it saith to you, “Ye are from home while here; ye are not of this world, as your Redeemer, Christ, was not of this world.” There is something keeping for you, which is worth the having. All that is here is condemned to die, to pass away like a snowball before a summer sun; and since death took first possession of something of yours, it hath been and daily is creeping nearer and nearer to yourself, howbeit with no noise of feet. Your Husbandman and Lord hath lopped off some branches already; the tree itself is to be transplanted to the high garden. In a good time be it. Our Lord ripen your Ladyship. All these crosses (and indeed, when I remember them, they are heavy and many,-peace, peace be the end of them I) are to make you white and ripe for the Lord’s harvest-hook. I have seen the Lord weaning you from the breasts of this world. It was never His mind it should be your patrimony; and God be thanked for that. Ye look the liker one of the heirs. Let the movables go; why not? They are not yours. Fasten your grips upon the heritage j and our Lord Jesus make the charters sure, and give your Ladyship to grow as a palm-tree on God’s mount Zion; howbeit shaken with winds, yet the root is fast. This is all I can do, to recommend your case to your Lord, who hath you written upon the palms of His hand. ~ Letters of Samuel Rutherford, p. 98-99
Kidney Stone Update
03 years ago
For those who followed my kidney stone sanctification and “fiery trial”, I wanted to post some further updates and thoughts. I had an appointment with a Urologist about a week and a half ago to tell me what the results of my tests were. The cause of my kidney stones: a healthy diet; however, a healthy diet that doesn’t give with my genetics.
The break down goes as follows. I eat a healthy diet (spinach for lunch, good food, etc. – all from the wonderful cooking of my wife). However, my diet is high in a chemical called Oxolate. In addition to this, for those who do not know, I am deathly allergic to milk. When I say allergic, for those who know the term, I have an anaphylactic reaction with milk. And for those who don’t know the term, it means that I can potentially die from ingesting milk of any kind. So, needless to say, that while I’ve had a healthy diet, I’ve been avoiding milk. “How does this relate to your kidney stones?” you ask. It relates in this way: milk consumption gives you a healthy does of calcium in your diet. Calcium and oxolate combine in your system to stay liquidized/non-solid state, and pass through your digestive system. So it turns out that my high-oxolate, and (genetically/providentially imposed) low-calcium diet produce a surplus of oxolate in my kidneys that then crystallizes and forms kidney stones. Fascinating, isn’t it!?
Going into the doctor’s appointment, I had the sneaking suspicion that my milk allergy had something to do with this whole kidney stone business. So, I left laughing a little bit to myself over this whole deal. But then, as an answer to my newfound discouragement, I realized that God gave me a wife who cares about me, and who desires to craft a healthy diet for me. So, you ask, what is oxolate in? Oh, only all of my favorite things! I’m now, by doctor’s orders and my wife’s faithfulness to follow them, on a low-oxolate diet. This means:
- No spinach for lunch (Which is “What’ev” since there’s other lettis out there, but this becomes tricky to avoid when we go to out to dinner since folks like to put it into food for good reasons)
- No soy products (Which is a major bummer, because I really like soy milk, soy ice cream, soy turkey, soy bread, etc. It’s only my milk supplement in all my food!)
- No tea (Which really got me angry – I love my afternoon tea!)
- More meat (Which is cool – I like dead animals cooks on my plate)
- Drink more water (Yuck! I’m not a big fan of water – much to the protest of that 80% or so of my body that is)
So you may be reading and wondering, “Why is Jacob posting this?” I’m posting mainly to draw out God’s providence in caring for my soul. I have not liked this whole second development on the kidney stone business. To begin with my diets fairly regulated, and now even more so. This “revelation” has shown how lazy I am to follow good advice – the kind of advice that helps you avoid pain and suffering (like kidney stones). I’ve still found my soul loving this world – using fleshly wisdom, rather than eschatological wisdom, the Spirit’s wisdom that looks to the New Heavens and the New Earth. As Richard B. Gaffin, Jr. comments on 1 Corinthians 2:12 – “Common grace –unlike special, gospel grace – is of ‘this age’; it is not eschatological” (Westminster Theological Journal, Vol. 57, No.1 – Spring 1995, p. 121). This event has shown that I care more about my present comfort and my determination to do little to make it change. I have been thinking with unspiritual, unredeemed tools. Redeemed mental tools look to the return of Christ, they are eschatological in their view.
Further, if I were completely honest, I just don’t like God’s plan on this. I don’t like it that God has constructed my body in such a way that I must give diligent care to its inner balance. I actually don’t like it that God hasn’t consulted me about me. I don’t like God’s providence; ultimately, I don’t like it that I’m not God. What a wretch I am! My little kidney stone has shown very much of my heart. I am a sinner to the core. As King David says, “there is no health in my bones because of my sin” (Ps. 38:3). But I have been drawn to think on God’s providence in this, his care for my soul. A line and image from Samuel Rutherford has stuck out to me recently. He says (to a different matter, but still applicable to my own soul), “the wicked may hold the bitter cup to your head, but god mixeth it, and there is no poison in it” (Letters of Samuel Rutherford, Letter XII, 54). This whole ordeal, with my body and such, is a cup straight from the hand of my Lord Jesus. Should I refuse this lesser cup when he’s already given me his cup of salvation, and the promise of that final cup of glory? I have been revealed through this simple process to be a weak man. Thankfully, I have a strong Savior.
