family

The prayer of a father in the middle of the night

0
6 months ago
by Jacob in , ,

The Lord has been very kind to me over the last year to help me see my need for Jesus in the bare hours of the night when he uses my son to teach me that I am not God, but am in desperate need of Him. Here is a prayer I’m learning, slowly, to pray that is simply enough to capture what’s needed:

Lord,

I’m a man of weakness;
You are a God full of strength.
This is you loving me,
To awaken me at 2am.

Give me grace to:

  • trust your providence
  • lean on your power
  • learn your patience.

Protect me from:

  • Anger
  • Self-pity
  • Self-love.

Make me a servant like Jesus to my family,
That Jesus would be great in my child’s eyes.

Amen.

Tiger-Eye Prowls: A poem to my son on his first birthday

3
7 months ago
by Jacob in ,

Tiger-Eye Prowls
A poem to my son on his first birthday

The good Lord’s stories are dust and flesh,
            Breaking the waves as faces and families.
So how do I, a flesh-skinned utterance,
            Fit into my words that which is small,
To describe The Author’s letters and syntax?
            Labor me, my son, spell a few of His words in you.

A few inches descended in bloody glory
            To exhausted euphoria breast;
Boy so small, yet mightier than a swirling galaxy
            In Yahweh’s blessing universe;
Cocoon-swaddling of cloth and promises,
            That lays us down to sleep;
The purring lion nap, chest to chest,
            In our pride on the couch;
Playing tickle-notes with dancing fingers
            Into explosive belly-full laughter;
Open-mouthed, dual fanged, sloppy
            Bouncing kisses precise in love.

Live! The Author says, Live!
            Delight in the grammar of His love.
Ode the Lord, who sings His chorus,
            Delighting in the creation of His hand:

            Call to the trees,
            Call to the hills,
            Adventure waits,
            Tiger-Eye prowls.

__________

The only notation I feel needs to be made with this poem is the last line, from which I draw the title: Tiger-eye. As you can see in this picture, Owen’s left eye has two little brown stripes in it, which has caused me from the beginning to affectionately call him Tiger-eye.

While I’m at it, if you prefer pictures of this cute boy to your humble blogger, you can find your cuteness-full at my wife’s blog: here.

The Name: Owen Scott

3
1 year ago
by Jacob in , , ,

Naming your children seems to be somewhat of an undefined art. Names come from all sorts of places (I once knew a girl whose mom named her after a soap opera character). Our son is no different. We’ve had names picked out for a while, so I wanted to share where we got Owen Scott from.

Owen

Apparently, Owen is a rather popular first name these days. I had no idea, but I can understand since I guess there’s some pop-culture guys these days with Owen for a first name making a good face for it’s use. For us, the name has nothing to do with actors or musicians. We get Owen’s name from a dead guy.

While in college, I started a friendship with a man named John Owen. He’s long since left the land of the living to be with his Lord Christ, but his influence and guidance upon my life has continued to be incalculable. In his writings, I began to see the glory of Christ portrayed in the Bible in such deeply compelling and beautiful ways that I’d never imagined before. He opened up for me the delight and beauty of Paul’s statement, “For God, who said, “Let light shine out of darkness,” has shone in our hearts to give the light of the knowledge of the glory of God in the face of Jesus Christ” (2 Cor. 4:6) in profoundly life changing ways. John Owen’s grasp of the human heart and how sin corrupts us so deeply while upholding the work and call of grace from Jesus Christ changed my entire understanding of the Christian life.

So we picked the name “Owen” in honor of John Owen, the Puritan. But there was another helper along the way.

Just a few weeks after Michelle and I got married, her Grandad passed away. He’d lived in London most of his life (her mum’s family is from the U.K.), but had originated from Wales. One day when Michelle was telling her Granny what we were going to name Owen, she told us that Grandad would love the name because it’s very Welsh. Come to find out, “wen” (or “wyn”) is distinctive to Wales. Granddad was the type of godly Christian man that I want to be like. He passionately loved his family and his Lord, while living a quiet life that honored Jesus. This, of course, made us even more excited about the name Owen because not only did we love it, but it honored Michelle’s Granddad.

Scott

Scott is a little less involved, and a little more… standard. My middle name is Scott, my Dad’s middle name is Scott, and part of my Grandmother’s name is Scott. My Grandmother got the name from her mother’s sister’s married name. My grandmother’s aunt was “very proud all her life to have been married to John F. Scott, the wealthiest man in Love County, Oklahoma, and one that was a good neighbor to his fellow citizens,” says my Grandmother. “They were both known for their good works in the community, she as a health provider for pregnant mothers and accident victims as well as sick livestock, and he as an emergency source for some work or a little money to get you out of a jam.  He once let an outlaw from a prominent family in the area hide out in the tangles of trees and brush down in the Red River bottoms until he was eventually found or he left.”

Young

This, of course, goes without explanation. Young is synonymous with awesome, and everything that goes with that (Burnett being incorporated here, of course). He is a Young, and the second most beautiful Young I know – Michelle being the first.

So there you have it. Owen (Puritan/Welsh) Scott (Good’ol Oklahoman) Young (pure awesome). Our beautiful boy!

Introducing Owen Scott Young

15
1 year ago
by Jacob in ,

Here is a great joy: Introducing our son, Owen Scott Young, who was born yesterday, October 18, 2010 at 5:24pm. He weighed in at 6 pounds, 10 ounces, measuring 20.5 inches. I’ll explain the nature of his name at a later time, but with no further delay, here are some pictures of my boy!

EDIT: If you want to know all the wonderful things Michelle has been doing to prepare for this beautiful boy, you can read all about it at her blog: The Young Family Blog.

Pregnancy v. Children?

4
2 years ago
by Jacob in , , , ,

A couple months ago, Michelle and I were on a date, talking through life (a normal, weekly practice for us). As usual, pregnancy stuff comes up where we check in and see how each other are doing – struggles, sins, weariness, dreams, longings, evidences of grace, etc. The question had been stirring around my mind for a couple days. I knew it wasn’t, well, the nicest type of question to ask, but it needed to be asked nonetheless. So in the best possible way, I ask the question to Michelle, “So, you know, pregnancy isn’t just about that 9 months, it’s about children after that. Do you think you want to be pregnant more than you want to have children?” The question really opened up an avenue of discussion for us that proved very insightful and helpful.

The question might seem a little odd at first, even callus. But I think it’s a Biblical question to think about. Is the desire for children so wrapped up in “just being pregnant” that the whole aspect of life after the delivery room is a distant mirage?

Pregnancy is, of course, a unique experience like none other. I’ve passed a few kidney stones (the Lord’s thorn in my side – literally – to humble me), but I don’t think that really counts. But in thinking about the building of a family, pregnancy is not the only way a family grows. The distinction is one of categories. The desire for children is one category, the desire to be pregnant is another category. Certainly the two have significant overlap, but we should see them separately ultimately because the desire for children supersedes the desire to be pregnant. A woman is only pregnant for 9 months at a time (and all the women of the world stood up and said, “Praise Jesus!”), but a family continues from generation to generation.

What this distinction does, especially for couples facing the challenge and suffering of infertility, is frees them to consider other options of what growing a family looks like. Infertility is an interesting place where the creeping question sits around, “If we try something else, or look at adoption options, are we not trusting God for children?” That’s a Satanic question. Not trusting God and looking at other options for fulfilling the desire for children are not coterminous. Can a couple pursue adoption as a means of not trusting God? Sure, but let’s keep the issues of the heart separated out on the dissection table.

This category separation has been helpful for us. We are able to see the desire for children as “the goal”, and pregnancy or adoption as “the means”. (This also has the devastating effect of destroying any genetic snobbery one might be harboring.) We desire children. We long for little cute faces running around our home. We look forward to our parents being grandparents. So, for us, the trajectory is looking towards both medical help to conceive, and adoption. We are pursuing both and seeing what God does with this. God loves children, and we know he desires children in our home. However we receive that gift from him is up to him.

Desiring godliness this year as a family

0
2 years ago
by Jacob in , , ,

Our Once a Year Date was blessed by the Lord and opened up some helpful observations about our life together and direction for where God is leading.

…the crown of her husband
This year has was marked by several turns were weren’t expecting. We ended the year having walked through answered prayers of joy for a pregnancy, and the sorrow of a miscarriage. We’ve rejoiced with several friends over their pregnancies and new children added to their family. These things don’t need to be drawn out, but they are major things. Through all of it, God has shown himself glorious and faithful. Jesus has been good to us. I’ve seen how our wedding text, Romans 8:18-39, was the exact text for our marriage, and how God is proving himself true to it’s claims.

One of the fruits of this past year is that we have grown to deeply rely and lean on each other. Michelle is the crown of my head and the shoulder I cry on. This isn’t just about children or pregnancy. In all areas of life we’ve grown to delight in each other, through pleasure and pain.

…be diligent to be found by him
One of the major things we saw lacking this past year was diligence. Life is very easily comfortable. Our schedule isn’t crazy. In reality, we’re just easily lazy – I am lazy. We’ve tried to do family worship before, but I’m not faithful to keep us on task. While it’s partly a discipline thing, it’s also an affection thing. If I were honest, I really just don’t desire the things of God that much. That impacts the character and flavor of my home.

Thus, we’re looking to this year with a major desire for diligence in knowing God. Diligence in prayer. Diligence in memorizing scripture. Diligence in desiring the spiritual gifts. Diligence in godliness.

Godliness is one of the things that I have been reflecting on. My deep-rooted love for the world and worldliness have become clear to me this past year. I love the world, and I love being involved in knowing all things about the world. Thus, my love for the things of God and his world are anemic. (“The love of the Father is not in you…”) My sins and desires influence my family. It’s just us right now, but it won’t be forever.

…and he will draw near to you
Therefore we need a plan. There are three categories I’m aiming to do this year: Reading, Memorizing, and Leading. In reading, I’ve set to read more on godliness and worldliness (obvious step, I know). I’m currently formulating the list of books to work through this year and will post it soon. But thankfully my wife got me Memoirs of an Ordinary Pastor by D.A. Carson. If anything, this book is enough and should be read by all Christians. Tom Carson’s example is beyond compelling. In desiring godliness, I must desire faithfulness.

I will also be adding Scripture Memory to my plan this year. Over the next 6 months I’m going to memorize the entire book of Colossians. Michelle will be doing this with me. I will take two mornings a week and substitute scripture memorizing into my plan instead of my regular Bible reading. In doing this, I know the Word of God will transform my mind and renew my affections for the things of God (Romans 12:1-2).

For our family, I’m not changing much but simply solidifying what we already have in place. The most regular and uninterrupted time of our day and week is dinner time. This tends to fluctuate because I have not been faithful to leave work on time. So, what I’m directing us to do is to have dinner at 6pm every night, which means I need to be faithful to leave work on time. With dinner at 6, we’ve going to incorporate some scripture reading and prayer together at the end of dinner. The scripture reading will simply follow along with whatever our pastors are preaching on at church. We’ll be going through Acts soon, so we’ll just art reading Acts through and through in this time.

I write all this up for personal discipline. This has all been thought out in my head, put on the table at date nights, and put in my journal. It hasn’t all been gathered into one place. I’m counting on a big God to make major changes in our family this year. I want the aroma of our home to be Christ. I want him in our family more clearly. I want Him. With whatever the Lord Jesus has for us in this coming year, we know he has our conformity to his image in mind. These plans have His character in mind. If we come to mind, I would covet your prayers for us on this.

For 2010 A.D.
Soli Deo Gloria

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